Caliban has plans for this s/f which will no doubt be made clear ...
Tourist information
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Anna
Originally posted by french frank View PostCaliban has plans for this s/f which will no doubt be made clear ...
(Offtopic: We had a terrible fight to stop our Tourist Information office being shut as a cost cutting exercise!)
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Originally posted by Anna View PostIt isn't given us to know those rare moments when people are wide open and the lightest touch can wither or heal. A moment too late and we can never reach them any more in this world.
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Originally posted by Anna View Post
And yes, please everyone pitch in with suggestions. Probably a good idea to concentrate on British sites within easy range (he says, having started with one in France ) but further afield might be fun too..."...the isle is full of noises,
Sounds and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not.
Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments
Will hum about mine ears, and sometime voices..."
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I hope everyone will help foreign tourists visiting the UK for the first time by giving them Gerard Hoffnung's advice, as in:
"All London brothels display a blue lamp."
"You will oblige your chambermaid by hanging your mattress out of the window in the morning."
"Have you heard the famous echo in the Reading Room of the British Museum?"
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Originally posted by umslopogaas View PostI hope everyone will help foreign tourists visiting the UK for the first time by giving them Gerard Hoffnung's advice, as in:
"All London brothels display a blue lamp."
"You will oblige your chambermaid by hanging your mattress out of the window in the morning."
"Have you heard the famous echo in the Reading Room of the British Museum?"
You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.
and
The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.
"...the isle is full of noises,
Sounds and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not.
Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments
Will hum about mine ears, and sometime voices..."
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Great stuff, Caliban: sounds like they could have originated with Hoffnung. More Hoffnung, which has very little to do with the thread title, but I couldnt resist. Letter from a Tyrolean landlord extolling the delights of his hotel:
"Standing amid savage scenery, the hotel offers stupendous revelations. There is a french widow in every bedroom ... affording delightful prospects!"
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Originally posted by umslopogaas View Post"Standing amid savage scenery, the hotel offers stupendous revelations. There is a french widow in every bedroom ... affording delightful prospects!""...the isle is full of noises,
Sounds and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not.
Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments
Will hum about mine ears, and sometime voices..."
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Originally posted by Serial_Apologist View PostThe cartoonist Larry did a lovely series in Punch many years ago on stately homes etc visits - the one I remember showing a low door bearing the words "Mind the step" across the lintel; looking down to the step, one sees another notice reading "Mind your head"!
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Originally posted by Petrushka View PostNotice seen in a hotel room in Bulgaria:
For room service, open door and shout 'Room Service'!
Wise words from even further East:
"...the isle is full of noises,
Sounds and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not.
Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments
Will hum about mine ears, and sometime voices..."
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