Constipation...

[Master Jacques]

...has just been brought on Rob Cowan, who is force-feeding us with Rosalyn Tureck's perfumed, stolid potter through the Goldberg Variations. Feeling utterly ghastly!

Does anyone have a solution for my problem?

[Serial_Apologist]

...has just been brought on Rob Cowan, who is force-feeding us with Rosalyn Tureck's perfumed, stolid potter through the Goldberg Variations. Feeling utterly ghastly!

Does anyone have a solution for my problem?

Neither was I moved by it.

[Nick Armstrong]

Does anyone have a solution for my problem?

Murray Perahia's offering is considerably looser....

[Richard Tarleton]

Murray Perahia's offering is considerably looser....

There are other piano versions guaranteed to Schiff(t) the blockage. I'd better not mention A Hewitt or it might start M. Vinteuil off.....

[Nick Armstrong]

There are other piano versions guaranteed to Schiff(t) the blockage.

Oh very good

I wish Ayrton Senna's family had produced an equally-talented pianist.

[richardfinegold]

...has just been brought on Rob Cowan, who is force-feeding us with Rosalyn Tureck's perfumed, stolid potter through the Goldberg Variations. Feeling utterly ghastly!

Does anyone have a solution for my problem?

I'm sure that Mr. Cowan thinks that you are full of it.

[Zucchini]

Does anyone have a solution for my problem?

Beating time to Bolero by flapping your buttocks should do the trick

[Madame Suggia]

..Or Shostakovich's Tahiti trot

[Pabmusic]

...Does anyone have a solution for my problem?

When I was about 13, there was a mathematician who worked it out with a pencil. It sounded good to me...

[Nick Armstrong]

When I was about 13, there was a mathematician who worked it out with a pencil. It sounded good to me...

Where we lived, they used pencil and paper but then we woz posh....

[Pabmusic]

Where we lived, they used pencil and paper but then we woz posh....

Don't boast. I'll have to concede. I'd suggest we shake on it, but I need to wash my hands first.

[Nick Armstrong]

Don't boast. I'll have to concede. I'd suggest we shake on it, but I need to wash my hands first.

[mangerton]

...has just been brought on Rob Cowan, who is force-feeding us with Rosalyn Tureck's perfumed, stolid potter through the Goldberg Variations. Feeling utterly ghastly!

Does anyone have a solution for my problem?

Why not try one of Beecham's lollipops..... or pills?

[Flay]

I suggest increasing your fibre intake with few Brandenburg Concertos

[umslopogaas]

I think this is all rather unfair. Rosalyn Tureck was highly regarded in her day and Rob Cowan (and I) are of a vintage that reveres the recordings from that time. OK, styles have changed, but I see no harm in a bit of nostalgia. And by the way, if you want a copy of the original HMV LP, be prepared to pay a lot of money, she may be out of fashion but she's VERY collectible.