Current favourite jokes

[Beef Oven!]

No hope for the young generation, IMO.

I overheard two youngsters talking on the bus yesterday and one said to the other:

"I've slept with a Brazilian"

The other one replied

"OMG! How many is a Brazilian??"

[LMcD]

Two Mennonite - I've just got it!

[Bryn]

Two Mennonite - I've just got it!

Once a knight, always a knight, (well, nearly always), but . . .

[Serial_Apologist]

Once a knight, always a knight, (well, nearly always), but . . .

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RjOyd4yzJrE

[Sir Velo]

Two Mennonite - I've just got it!

Yes, it helps to say it.

Basically, I think Beef's a bit miffed that his joke wasn't as funny.

[antongould]

Or

I bought a desk from our local charity shop, and when I opened a drawer twenty three people fell out.
Turns out it was a missing persons bureau.

night night

I have missed these ER ........

Crime in multi storey car parks ........ wrong on so many levels .......

[gradus]

Yes, it helps to say it.

Basically, I think Beef's a bit miffed that his joke wasn't as funny.

Speaking of things unfunny I thought I might get a riff going with 'Horns of a dilemma' but sadly no takers. Must try harder!

[Edgy 2]

I heard about a cannibal who came back from his holidays with a leg missing.
Apparently he went self catering

[gurnemanz]

I heard about a cannibal who came back from his holidays with a leg missing.
Apparently he went self catering

What has four legs and an arm?

A rottweiler.

[Edgy 2]

Very good

After a series of crimes in the Norwich area, Norfolk Police have announced that they are looking for a man with one eye.
If they don't find him, they are going to use both eyes. (2 Ronnies joke that one I think)

[LMcD]

Very good

After a series of crimes in the Norwich area, Norfolk Police have announced that they are looking for a man with one eye.
If they don't find him, they are going to use both eyes. (2 Ronnies joke that one I think)

Reports are coming in that they've all been sent to clear the A149, which has been blocked by the hordes of media types that have turned up to cover an accident involving a 97 year old gentleman with Greek connections.

[LMcD]

Yes, it helps to say it.

Basically, I think Beef's a bit miffed that his joke wasn't as funny.

I actually got it straight away - as usual, I was just hoping to lighten the tone of the conversation!

[Beef Oven!]

Yes, it helps to say it.

Basically, I think Beef's a bit miffed that his joke wasn't as funny.

My Diane Abbot joke was hilarious - even if I say so myself

[Beef Oven!]

Reports are coming in that they've all been sent to clear the A149, which has been blocked by the hordes of media types that have turned up to cover an accident involving a 97 year old gentleman with Greek connections.

I think you mean a 97 year old Greek with connections ........

[ahinton]

I think you mean a 97 year old Greek with connections ........

...but probably no drivers' licence - not even a Greek one...