Current favourite jokes

[Dave2002]

OK - but why is it OK to joke about viola players or altos, but not about blondes? In the latter case presumably it's because the "definition" of the stereotype is severely flawed, but in fact that is the case with many such stereotypes. So as not to be overtly sexist, and give balance I'll also mention that some male sports stereotypes are problematic if put under close scrutiny.

[jean]

I do not know the answers to your questions.

Meanwhile:

[Serial_Apologist]

The head's too big, jean!

[gradus]

I do not know the answers to your questions.

Meanwhile:

https://www.facebook.com/OccupyDemocrats/videos/1516073775152338/

[Serial_Apologist]

https://www.facebook.com/OccupyDemoc...6073775152338/

It was this big. Then only this big. Etc etc.

[johncorrigan]

Enjoyed Jenny Agutter's joke in the Grauny at the weekend.


Q: What did Freud say came between fear and sex?

A: Fünf.

[Serial_Apologist]

Enjoyed Jenny Agutter's joke in the Grauny at the weekend.


Q: What did Freud say came between fear and sex?

A: Fünf.

- The sort of joke one wonders that no one has thought of before!

[pastoralguy]

Ah, Jenny Agutter.

[richardfinegold]

A young executive has just been hired by a major firm and is eager to make a good impression. He is determined to burn the midnight oil longer than anyone else the first day. When he finally leaves he is startled to see the big boss standing in front of a paper shredder.
The boss asks him "Can you help me? I have a very sensitive document here. My secretary has gone home for the day and I don't know how to operate any of the equipment."
The new hire takes the document and carefully feeds it into the shredder. The relieved boss says "Thanks. I only need one copy."

[Serial_Apologist]

A young executive has just been hired by a major firm and is eager to make a good impression. He is determined to burn the midnight oil longer than anyone else the first day. When he finally leaves he is startled to see the big boss standing in front of a paper shredder.
The boss asks him "Can you help me? I have a very sensitive document here. My secretary has gone home for the day and I don't know how to operate any of the equipment."
The new hire takes the document and carefully feeds it into the shredder. The relieved boss says "Thanks. I only need one copy."

A joke from an era before such "secrets" would be filed on-line, and probably already hacked!

[Nick Armstrong]

Fancy Dress Party

Host: What have you come as?

Me: A harp

Host: Your costume's too small to be a harp

Me: Are you calling me a lyre?

[EdgeleyRob]

"What do you do for a living?"
"I'm a spy."
"Why are you dressed as a shepherd?"
"I'm a shepherd spy."

[EdgeleyRob]

My friend keeps saying
"could be worse,you could be stuck in an underground hole full of water"
I know he means well.

[EdgeleyRob]

"Doctor,doctor every time I see a biro lid,I get all sad and tearful"
"Tell me how long have you had these pen top emotions?"

[gradus]

"Doctor,doctor every time I see a biro lid,I get all sad and tearful"
"Tell me how long have you had these pen top emotions?"

This thread is on fire, great run!