Originally posted by ahinton
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Current favourite jokes
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Originally posted by Richard Barrett View PostI went to the zoo and there was only one animal, a dog. It was a Shih Tzu.
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"...the isle is full of noises,
Sounds and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not.
Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments
Will hum about mine ears, and sometime voices..."
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Here's one for you, Bbm!!
A brass band was engaged to play in the local park. Their contract said that they could pack up and go home if there was no audience, but if just one person was watching, they would have to play their entire one-hour programme. The band began to play, the sun was shining, and there were 80 people sitting in deckchairs enjoying the music.
Within ten minutes, the heavens opened, the wind blew a gale, and the audience ran to take shelter...all except one man. The concert continued. Rain was lashing into the faces of the musicians, their sheet music was being blown away...but one man stubbornly remained seated.
At the end of the concert, the sodden conductor approached the man and said: 'Bloody hell, you must really love brass band music'.
The man replied: 'Not really, no"
The conductor asks "then why did you stay until the end?"
He said "Because it's my job to put the deckchairs away"
I'm here all week. I've got my coat just in case.
"...the isle is full of noises,
Sounds and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not.
Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments
Will hum about mine ears, and sometime voices..."
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Originally posted by Caliban View PostHere's one for you, Bbm!!
A brass band was engaged to play in the local park. Their contract said that they could pack up and go home if there was no audience, but if just one person was watching, they would have to play their entire one-hour programme. The band began to play, the sun was shining, and there were 80 people sitting in deckchairs enjoying the music.
Within ten minutes, the heavens opened, the wind blew a gale, and the audience ran to take shelter...all except one man. The concert continued. Rain was lashing into the faces of the musicians, their sheet music was being blown away...but one man stubbornly remained seated.
At the end of the concert, the sodden conductor approached the man and said: 'Bloody hell, you must really love brass band music'.
The man replied: 'Not really, no"
The conductor asks "then why did you stay until the end?"
He said "Because it's my job to put the deckchairs away"
I'm here all week. I've got my coat just in case.
Don’t cry for me
I go where music was born
J S Bach 1685-1750
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Originally posted by Dave2002 View PostI'm afraid I usually saw the board duster coming, and ducked, so the lad behind got it!
We also had one or two physics teachers who were handy with a piece of rubber rubing.
(When one thinks of the potential for serious injury, it's amazing what they were allowed to get away with, back in the 1960s.)
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