Current favourite jokes

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
  • ahinton
    Full Member
    • Nov 2010
    • 16122

    Originally posted by Serial_Apologist View Post
    The government announces rolling out its new, extended levelling up programme, YouCrane.
    Has anyone yet responded to it "YouCrane if you want to (&c.)..."

    Comment

    • Serial_Apologist
      Full Member
      • Dec 2010
      • 37595

      Originally posted by ahinton View Post
      Has anyone yet responded to it "YouCrane if you want to (&c.)..."
      This brass neck is NOT for craning!!!

      Comment

      • Serial_Apologist
        Full Member
        • Dec 2010
        • 37595

        Originally posted by Nick Armstrong View Post
        Naan bed:



        (I think they should have added pillow rice)
        An unleavened bed would presumably have to be one in which only one person has ever slept, then!

        Comment

        • Nick Armstrong
          Host
          • Nov 2010
          • 26523

          Originally posted by Serial_Apologist View Post
          An unleavened bed would presumably have to be one in which only one person has ever slept, then!

          Just hope the mattress doesn’t saag
          "...the isle is full of noises,
          Sounds and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not.
          Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments
          Will hum about mine ears, and sometime voices..."

          Comment

          • Serial_Apologist
            Full Member
            • Dec 2010
            • 37595

            Originally posted by Nick Armstrong View Post

            Just hope the mattress doesn’t saag
            It wouldn't curry favour with me!

            Comment

            • kindofblue
              Full Member
              • Nov 2015
              • 140

              Originally posted by Nick Armstrong View Post
              Naan bed:



              (I think they should have added pillow rice)
              That's raita up my street!

              Comment

              • Nick Armstrong
                Host
                • Nov 2010
                • 26523

                Originally posted by kindofblue View Post
                That's raita up my street!

                Hope there’s an en-suite aloo
                "...the isle is full of noises,
                Sounds and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not.
                Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments
                Will hum about mine ears, and sometime voices..."

                Comment

                • kindofblue
                  Full Member
                  • Nov 2015
                  • 140

                  Originally posted by Nick Armstrong View Post

                  Hope there’s an en-suite aloo
                  Didn't see that one cumin!

                  Comment

                  • Serial_Apologist
                    Full Member
                    • Dec 2010
                    • 37595

                    Originally posted by kindofblue View Post
                    Didn't see that one cumin!
                    It wasn't, it was bolton...

                    Comment

                    • ahinton
                      Full Member
                      • Nov 2010
                      • 16122

                      This is now starting to saag, methinks...

                      Comment

                      • RichardB
                        Banned
                        • Nov 2021
                        • 2170

                        They say the old ones are the best, but this from today's Independent really did make me LOL:

                        Four key members of Boris Johnson’s team resigning on Thursday was the result of the prime minister “taking charge”, a minister has claimed. Energy minister Greg Hands said: “The Prime Minister was absolutely clear on Monday that there would be changes at the top of No 10 and that is what he has delivered.”

                        Comment

                        • ahinton
                          Full Member
                          • Nov 2010
                          • 16122

                          Originally posted by RichardB View Post
                          They say the old ones are the best, but this from today's Independent really did make me LOL:
                          You just couldn't make it up, could you?! Well, at least I couldn't...

                          Comment

                          • Nick Armstrong
                            Host
                            • Nov 2010
                            • 26523

                            Originally posted by ahinton View Post
                            This is now starting to saag, methinks...

                            No that started back at #4250
                            "...the isle is full of noises,
                            Sounds and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not.
                            Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments
                            Will hum about mine ears, and sometime voices..."

                            Comment

                            • Serial_Apologist
                              Full Member
                              • Dec 2010
                              • 37595

                              Lawn order does wonders for grasses!

                              Comment

                              • oddoneout
                                Full Member
                                • Nov 2015
                                • 9145

                                The newly appointed Minister for Brexit Opportunities has written a letter to Sun readers appealing for ideas...

                                Comment

                                Working...
                                X