Originally posted by DoctorT
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This story is available in full at: www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b09jqt7d - scroll down almost to the bottom. -
Ah yes:Originally posted by LMcD View Post
"It happened in 1636. Mrs Descartes held a New Year’s Eve party and René, he hated parties. So she said – Well I’m going to sit you in the room where people will eat while we do the New Year together, all the guests in the other room. And she sat Descartes down and she said – Now just get on with some philosophising and we’ll come and see you later. Now she’d decided that they wouldn’t eat till after they’d done the New Year celebrations and they would wait about an hour afterwards before they put anything inside them. And to this purpose she’d made a lot of quiche, she had this table piled up with quiche and because the word buffet actually means – we have more people than chairs – René sat down on the carpet with his friend, his dear friend at pre-school Father Durante. So while René did his philosophising Father Durante read the good book. And René wrote down anything that came into his head on the subject of corporal rationality. And while he was writing on a paper napkin he looked up and saw to his horror that Father Durante had absently taken one of the quiche and was munching it. Now Mrs Descartes was a rather stern lady, he noticed her looking in from the other room, so he took a paper napkin and wrote a message to his friend and that is the source of the 300 odd years misunderstanding because it was not – I think therefore I am – what he actually wrote was – I think they’re for one am. "Comment
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"I don't care how spectacular Fishfield is, it is pointless getting soaking wet for three days in single digit temperatures with the cloud so low the scenery is invisible":
Unhappy holidaymaker Al from Horsham post on Ukweatherworld earlier on this afternoon.
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"Good evening. Do you have a moment to talk about Dracula?"
"No, sorry... hang on, did you say Dracula?"
"Yes!"
"What, you mean you're vampires?"
"Yes. We have pamphlets you might like to read."
"So you're vampire missionaries?"
"Where else do you think new vampires come from?"
"I assumed you bit people on the neck."
"Well, there are many hurtful stereotypes. May we come in?"Comment
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We're just back from the Orkney Isles, and the same applied to 6 of the 8 days there. We had the benefit of the folk festival for 4 evenings, etc, to divert us.Originally posted by Serial_Apologist View Post"I don't care how spectacular Fishfield is, it is pointless getting soaking wet for three days in single digit temperatures with the cloud so low the scenery is invisible":
Unhappy holidaymaker Al from Horsham post on Ukweatherworld earlier on this afternoon.Comment
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A man is stacking shelves in Asda with washing powder.
A woman walks up to him and says”you liar,you told me you were a pilot”
“No I didn’t “ he said “ I told you I was in the Ariel display team”“Music is the best means we have of digesting time." — Igor StravinskyComment
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Just have to suck it and see, otherwise all the effort's in vein.Originally posted by Serial_Apologist View PostComment
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I didn't get this at first, but on reflection ... oh ...Originally posted by Richard Barrett View Post[FONT=Comic Sans MS][I][B]Numquam Satis![/B][/I][/FONT]Comment
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Apologies if someone's already posted this...
Costume Party
Host: What are you?
Me: a harp
Host: your costume's too small to be a harp
Me: are you calling me a lyre?Comment
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Originally posted by Joseph K View Post
Costume Party
Host: What are you?
Me: A snail
Host: Why do you have a woman on your back?
Me: That's Michelle!
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Vampires need to be invited into a house before they can enter it.
(Similarly, they don't cast a reflection.)[FONT=Comic Sans MS][I][B]Numquam Satis![/B][/I][/FONT]Comment
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