Current favourite jokes

[LeMartinPecheur]

Oh I'll cope - I'll go and lob some used teabags at the compost heap to annoy the rat that's taken up residence.

Were you really thinking that your journey to the precise mid-point between 'Braccan Heal' and Launceston could count as 'necessary'?

Or were you just planning to send a courier?

[MrGongGong]

Oh I'll cope - I'll go and lob some used teabags at the compost heap to annoy the rat that's taken up residence.

Teabags have a tendency to leave "ghosts" and don't compost well
What's wrong with loose tea ?

I find that a trap baited with peanut butter usually does the trick for the "big mice"

[jayne lee wilson]

Oh I'll cope - I'll go and lob some used teabags at the compost heap to annoy the rat that's taken up residence.

Don't be unpleasant to Rats - they make wonderful intelligent affectionate pets...... don't bother them they won't bother you (unless you insist on supplying them with natural food sources all in one convenient pile near your house....)

But if you really must, get a farm cat .... or a feral from somewhere... best hired executioners in the business - and it all goes to the good cause of feeding cats...
Or encourage the local Foxes....

[oddoneout]

Don't be unpleasant to Rats - they make wonderful intelligent affectionate pets...... don't bother them they won't bother you (unless you insist on supplying them with natural food sources all in one convenient pile near your house....)

But if you really must, get a farm cat .... or a feral from somewhere... best hired executioners in the business - and it all goes to the good cause of feeding cats...
Or encourage the local Foxes....

The compost heap is 200 ft from the back door so I don't intend to be seriously unpleasant to the rat(s), but I will continue the disturbance so that I don't end up with a breeding colony there, and yet more holes in the garden shed, tools and equipment damaged etc. Normally the rats move out into the adjacent farmland by now and won't come back until autumn(when the neighbour's apple tree proves irresistible) but I have a suspicion that there has been some learned behaviour passed on to the next generation linked with the increasing presence of bird feeders beyond winter in adjacent gardens the past couple of years.
Something which might help is that the neighbours with the neglected garden are now tackling the jungle, since the covid 19 situation means they can't entertain their children at relatives or have them out of the way at school and they need the space, which should reduce or remove the cover and hideyholes on their side, so diving under the fence is less attractive to the rats.

[oddoneout]

Were you really thinking that your journey to the precise mid-point between 'Braccan Heal' and Launceston could count as 'necessary'?

Or were you just planning to send a courier?

There seem to be several 'experts' available to ask for advice on that front...

[MrGongGong]

How do you tell the sex of an ant?

Drop it in water
If it sinks it's a girl ant

If it floats ..........

[Bryn]

How do you tell the sex of an ant?

Drop it in water
If it sinks it's a girl ant

If it floats ..........

But these are almost exclusively 'girl ants':



A Fire Ant raft.

[LezLee]

If it’s well-mannered, it’s a gal-ant

[LMcD]

But these are almost exclusively 'girl ants':



A Fire Ant raft.

Hard to tell without any background detail, but it looks gigantic to me.

[Bryn]

Hard to tell without any background detail, but it looks gigantic to me.

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-fire-ants-form-giant-rafts-to-survive-floods/

[oddoneout]

But these are almost exclusively 'girl ants':



A Fire Ant raft.

Not to be confused with a Fire Hydrant.

[Serial_Apologist]

But these are almost exclusively 'girl ants':



A Fire Ant raft.

I thought that was an aerial view of the Isle of Wight on any bank holiday apart from the most recent one.

[Serial_Apologist]

Hard to tell without any background detail, but it looks gigantic to me.

Oh very good!

[LeMartinPecheur]

To get onto that raft they'll have needed a ramp-ant.

EDIT And several assist-ants?

[Serial_Apologist]

To get onto that raft they'll have needed a ramp-ant.

We're not allowing any ant ticks here.