Current favourite jokes

[MrGongGong]

Why do Marxists drink herbal tea ?

[Richard Barrett]

Why do Marxists drink herbal tea ?

That would be because proper tea is theft. I wasn't in the SWP for nothing you know.

[MrGongGong]

That would be because proper tea is theft. I wasn't in the SWP for nothing you know.

[Bryn]

... I wasn't in the SWP for nothing you know.

Good to know you paid your dues. I bet they were lower than those of one of the other organisations of the British micro-left (which organisation I will not name). The rule was that one paid to the organisaton an amound identical to that one paid to the state in income tax.

[ahinton]

A man goes into a bar, and ----------

---------- changes a light bulb?...

[ahinton]

Those crafty capitalists, eh - pretending they too have to live in the same sustainable environment as the rest of us!

I know; to some of them, I daresay that those "seeds of revolution and change" are being propagated by Monsanto.

[ahinton]

That would be because proper tea is theft. I wasn't in the SWP for nothing you know.

I always thought that the question was "why do Marxists drink P. G. Tips" but what do I know?...

[ahinton]

Good to know you paid your dues. I bet they were lower than those of one of the other organisations of the British micro-left (which organisation I will not name). The rule was that one paid to the organisaton an amound identical to that one paid to the state in income tax.

So some members paid nothing at all, then?

[Bryn]

So some members paid nothing at all, then?

Indeed, including some dole claimng 'leaders' IIRC, but most of the membership were in emplyment of one sort or another, some rather well remunerated. You gorra laff, innit.

[ahinton]

Indeed, including some dole claimng 'leaders' IIRC, but most of the membership were in emplyment of one sort or another, some rather well remunerated. You gorra laff, innit.

Indeed, although I didn't find it so funny when the Musicians' Union offered me no discount when I joined it aged 13, even though I wasn't exactly raking it in at the time...

[P. G. Tipps]

I always thought that the question was "why do Marxists drink P. G. Tips" but what do I know?...

Well, the answer to the second question might be rather easier than the first ... ?

As to the first, I can only suggest that the drink in this case doesn't seem to have worked .. ?

[johncorrigan]

A skeleton walks into a bar and says, 'I'll have a beer and a mop, please.'

[johncorrigan]

A man goes into a bar, and ----------

Is it, 'A man walks into a bar...ouch! it was an iron bar, Ff, ?'

[MrGongGong]

A piece of string walks into a bar
Above the counter there is a big sign saying WE DON'T SERVE STRING
The piece of string calls the bartender over and says "Can I have a pint of beer please ?"
The bartender points to the sign and says "Can't you read ? we don't serve string!"
So the piece of string goes into the toilets and twists and turns itself into a ball and rubs itself over the corner of the door, walks back into the bar and says
"Can I have a pint of beer please?"
The bartender says "Aren't you a piece of string?"
To which the string replies
"I'm afraid not"

[MrGongGong]

http://rochdaleherald.co.uk/2017/06/24/glastonbury-food-vendors-uproar-jeremy-corbyn-feeds-festival-five-loaves-two-fish/