Festive bloopers

[Triforium]

"Mummy, who IS Saint Knickerless?"

Patron saint of commandos?

[terratogen]

Litttle boy to mum this morning, in our local Saint Sprees:

"Mummy, who IS Saint Knickerless?"

Watching a film adaptation of A Christmas Carol, I once asked my parents why the Ghost of Christmas Present didn't seem to be wearing anything under his Father Christmas robes. (Wasn't he cold?)

I suppose 'Angels We Have Heard While High' is just too easy.

[Serial_Apologist]

Someone who never appears in Pantiemime?

BEHIND you!

[Flosshilde]

My dearest darling Edward, Dec 25
What a wonderful surprise has just greeted me! That sweet partridge, in that lovely little pear-tree; what an enchanting, romantic, poetic present! Bless you, and thank you.
Your deeply loving Emily.

[etc etc]
————

I heard this on In Tune, & I'm afraid it gets it rather wrong. Emily would have cut of relations with Edward very much sooner if he had stuck to the carol -

"On the first day of Christmas ... a partridge in a pear tree. On the second day of Christmas ... two turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree. On the third day of Christmas ... three French hens, two turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree"

So by the third day, dear Emily would have three French Hens, four turtle doves, three partridges, and three pear trees. And she still had nine days to go! By the end she would have a fairly decent pear orchard, but the 42 geese would have made rather a mess of it, not to mention the cows the 32 maids were milking

[Magnificat]

Well, I hope Rudolph and Olive, the other reindeer, safely guided Santa's sleigh to your chimneys and you all got the presents you asked for!

If any of you will be singing Britten's 'A New Year Carol' please remember that it is levy - dew and not residue!

Those who see The Virgin Mary as an image of hope for the New Year and wish to say the 'Hail Mary' should know that the phrase used is 'Blessed art thou amongst women' and not ' Blessed art thou, a monk swimming'!

A Happy New Year to one and all.

VCC.

[Magnificat]

PS

Flosshilde

I always thought that the gift on the first day of Christmas was a part-red gingerbread tree?!!

VCC

[Petrushka]

A festive blooper of my own. At our parish church 9 Lessons and Carols way back on December 29 1968 (oh yes I remember the exact date!) I was down, as choirboy, to read the first lesson (Genesis 3, vv 8-19). Due to my short stature and in order to see the Bible, I had to stand on a box which our Vicar had procured from somewhere. All went well in the rehearsal but was definitely not all right on the night. As I went up to the lectern, I somehow planted one foot on one side of the box in such a way that made it. and me, tip over and crash to the ground.

My only consolation,apart from the fact that I managed to deliver the lesson, is that 43 years later, the Vicar, Choirmaster and most of the congregation are long gone.

[Lizzie]

A festive blooper of my own. At our parish church 9 Lessons and Carols way back on December 29 1968 (oh yes I remember the exact date!) I was down, as choirboy, to read the first lesson (Genesis 3, vv 8-19). Due to my short stature and in order to see the Bible, I had to stand on a box which our Vicar had procured from somewhere. All went well in the rehearsal but was definitely not all right on the night. As I went up to the lectern, I somehow planted one foot on one side of the box in such a way that made it. and me, tip over and crash to the ground.

My only consolation,apart from the fact that I managed to deliver the lesson, is that 43 years later, the Vicar, Choirmaster and most of the congregation are long gone.

Oh Petrushka, your admission leads to one of mine own... Aged 5 and taking part in my very first school nativity play, back in the 50s, I was selected to be an angel. Picture a little blonde haired member of the Heavenly Host, standing on a kiddie school chair, behind the manger, in a prime performing position. Said angel, spotted Mum in the front row, and with tinsel halo increasingly slipping over one ear, really got into singing Away in a manger, with extreme levels of gusto. So much gusto in fact, that little angel weed all over the Holy Stable! One ecstatic angel, one mortified Mum, and the end of one acting career!
Happy 2012 all. Bws. Liz

[Petrushka]

Oh Petrushka, your admission leads to one of mine own... Aged 5 and taking part in my very first school nativity play, back in the 50s, I was selected to be an angel. Picture a little blonde haired member of the Heavenly Host, standing on a kiddie school chair, behind the manger, in a prime performing position. Said angel, spotted Mum in the front row, and with tinsel halo increasingly slipping over one ear, really got into singing Away in a manger, with extreme levels of gusto. So much gusto in fact, that little angel weed all over the Holy Stable! One ecstatic angel, one mortified Mum, and the end of one acting career!
Happy 2012 all. Bws. Liz

Another Christmas, another festive blooper...

My acting career ended at about the same age as I did, perhaps, take it all a bit too literally. I played Little Boy Blue who, as you know, fell asleep under the haystack. Trouble was, I really did fall asleep!

[Lizzie]

Another Christmas, another festive blooper...

My acting career ended at about the same age as I did, perhaps, take it all a bit too literally. I played Little Boy Blue who, as you know, fell asleep under the haystack. Trouble was, I really did fall asleep!

Wondrous! <grin>

[Double Diapason]

A festive blooper of my own. At our parish church 9 Lessons and Carols way back on December 29 1968 (oh yes I remember the exact date!) I was down, as choirboy, to read the first lesson (Genesis 3, vv 8-19). Due to my short stature and in order to see the Bible, I had to stand on a box which our Vicar had procured from somewhere. All went well in the rehearsal but was definitely not all right on the night. As I went up to the lectern, I somehow planted one foot on one side of the box in such a way that made it. and me, tip over and crash to the ground.

My only consolation,apart from the fact that I managed to deliver the lesson, is that 43 years later, the Vicar, Choirmaster and most of the congregation are long gone.

The fall of man - or in this case boy............