IF you could start again...which orchestral instrument would you learn?

[Simon B]

I would definitely go for the tray of crockery (as used in Ligeti's Apparitions)

Not rhythmic (wall?)paper ripping as in e.g. Zimmermann's Ekklesiastische Aktion then? The challenge there being to keep a straight face, which in this piece is definitely the order of the day - levity is emphatically not on the agenda.

One to avoid at all costs is the champagne cork popper (as in the "Champagne Galop" by... someone or other) - a bicycle pump with the business end removed and a cork on a string shoved in its place. When, as is almost inevitable, even with violent pump action the cork just lazily slumps out and no pop is forthcoming you look such a %&$*. The usual rule of "if in doubt, smile and play louder" is no help at all...

[salymap]

Quite fancy a go at firing a cannon in the 1812.

Seriously though piano for me.
How long would it take to learn Alkan's symphony for solo piano ?

I studiedthe piano with a local teacher but as soon as I started working in the music library and going to concerts I gave up as I realised I was too old [17] to get anywhere. It is a long slog but I liked playing from vocal scores etc for my own enjoyment. Now have forgotten all I learned

[MrGongGong]

Not rhythmic (wall?)paper ripping as in e.g. Zimmermann's Ekklesiastische Aktion then? The challenge there being to keep a straight face, which in this piece is definitely the order of the day - levity is emphatically not on the agenda.

One to avoid at all costs is the champagne cork popper (as in the "Champagne Galop" by... someone or other) - a bicycle pump with the business end removed and a cork on a string shoved in its place. When, as is almost inevitable, even with violent pump action the cork just lazily slumps out and no pop is forthcoming you look such a %&$*. The usual rule of "if in doubt, smile and play louder" is no help at all...

David Bedford's Balloon Music is a good one to try also....... and Drinking and Hooting Machine and Tan Dun's Paper Concerto / Water Concerto and Magnus Lindberg's Kraft and so on .........

[EdgeleyRob]

Dunno, but your man turned up on CD review this morning I think.

Missed that,I'll try to catch on i player.

[LeMartinPecheur]

If I could get good enough to play solo, the cello. If condemned to mere orchestral eminence, the french horn.

I did once make noises on a friend's horn - indeed I 'taught' him to play four-part chords on it as in the Weber Concertino (I'd read how to do it, typical me) - he said I had a 'high embouchure' which was good - easier for such to learn to play the low notes than it is for low embouchures to play the high ones! Wonder if it sags at all over 40yrs...

[Waldhorn and Hornspieler, please look the other way...idiots are still allowed on here AFAIK]

[Eine Alpensinfonie]

I would actually learn fewer instruments. I have to be able to play all the woodwind family of instruments for my work, and as I play the piano as well, that's really too many plates to spin.

Yet I'm trying to learn the bagpipes.

[Flosshilde]

I did contemplate learning to play the bagpipes - on the possibly mistaken grounds that one didn't need to be able to read music to play them. I also rather like the sound.

There used to be someone living nearby who practiced in the morning in the park.

[johnb]

Without any hesitation whatsoever it would be the oboe. I adore it.

Some people have mentioned the French Horn. In my very early teens I did a couple of terms of French Horn lessons, at school, with one of the horn players from the then BBC Northern. There was, for me, a fatal flaw in his teaching method though - he never actually explained what the valves actually do (i.e. lower the pitch by a semitone, tone, etc).

[MickyD]

I would have to start with the piano, I guess, in order to finally achieve my dream of being a harpsichordist. I can't think of anything nicer than going around National Trust properties etc and playing all those historical instruments, such as those at Fenton House.

[Padraig]

Without any hesitation whatsoever it would be the .....

Just a second. This is ANOTHER instrument? Don't people remember the amount of practice required? And we all want to do it again?
No thanks.
However, I wouldn't mind developing a competent strum on a guitar/banjo, or a simple unobtrusive bass guitar technique. That way I might get to play with some jazz, pop,folk, traditional musicians who have done all the hard work.

[gamba]

Must be brief, not feeling too good. Working on a film about a great Scottish Fiddler & songwriter we used the facilities of luthier, a onetime viola player from the Halle orchestra. Both he & the director were discussing one of the Beethoven qts. When I joined in with some comment they asked me about which instrument I played. " None" said I. They were very surprised. " Then you must " said they. Two sleepless nights later I returned & bought a cello. I then received advice about getting a good teacher. Two years later, with help from a violinist friend, we set up a string quartet & actually played early Mozart & Haydn,

Just remember one thing, learning should be & can be, a pleasure at any age

[jayne lee wilson]

Percussion looks the cushiest number... watch the orchestra most of the time then join in and rise to walloping prominence in the biggest moments! Great.
Or commission ACTUAL LIVING COMPOSERS to write concertos for you, and be seen as an enlightened artist of the floating world....

But no - I'd just beg someone to put me in front of an orchestra, with a stick to wave around, as early in my life as possible - by the time I was 50 I might be quite good at it.

[Mary Chambers]

Oboe for me, because I love the sound and it has some nice bits in lots of orchestral pieces. Harp would be good, too, but a bit difficult to move around.

[salymap]

Slightly off my own topic, but does physical build determine the most suitable instrument at all?

My uncle, a prof violinist, [well, started playing in cinemas, had a semi-amateur quartet, played on boats to New Zealand before WW2], tried to teach me when I was about 15.
I never got beyond very simple pieces and it made my neck and shoulder ache so much. Piano was less effort.

[amateur51]

Must be brief, not feeling too good. Working on a film about a great Scottish Fiddler & songwriter we used the facilities of luthier, a onetime viola player from the Halle orchestra. Both he & the director were discussing one of the Beethoven qts. When I joined in with some comment they asked me about which instrument I played. " None" said I. They were very surprised. " Then you must " said they. Two sleepless nights later I returned & bought a cello. I then received advice about getting a good teacher. Two years later, with help from a violinist friend, we set up a string quartet & actually played early Mozart & Haydn,

Just remember one thing, learning should be & can be, a pleasure at any age

Sound advice, gamba

I hope that you're feeling better