Extremely annoying pieces of classical music

[arthroceph]

I'd like to mention Karl Jenkins at this point (if he hasn't been mentioned yet ... haven't read all 42 pages of this thread yet).

But why come up with the words when someone has already reflected my opinion? http://blogs.spectator.co.uk/2016/07...-crappy-music/

[gradus]

Pachelbel's Canon, mentioned in despatches before but still every bit as tedious.

[MickyD]

Pachelbel's Canon, mentioned in despatches before but still every bit as tedious.

But have you ever heard this version? I hope it might convert you...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtZjROpBReM

[ARBurton]

Prokofiev - Montagues and Capulets. Vying for top ranking with Debussy - Gollywog`s cakewalk.

[Suffolkcoastal]

Basically any piece that's churned out regularly by R3 can become annoying if you keep hearing it when you switch on.

So basically
enough short rides in fast machines
I wish Slavs & Romanians would stop dancing
Hungarians would stop dancing, marching and rhapsodising
I would be Glad if I didn't hear it so often
The Tahiti Trot would trot off
Mother Goose would fly off for a while taking Alborado with her
Daphnis & Chloe would take a holiday
The Lark would descend for a bit
Midsummer would stop dreaming
The Faun find something else to do of an afternoon
Espana would stay there
We could have a Rhapsody in a different colour to Blue
Hoe-up and disappear
The Queen of Sheba would stop arriving and depart for a change
Fingal would stay in his cave and remain silent
The Bride would actually be Bartered for something else
Schwanda would lose his bagpipes
Someone would stop winding up the Viennese Clock for Hary Janos
Throw a bucket of water over The Firebird
Lock Romeo & Juliet in the tomb and throw away the key
The Sleeping Beauty would actually stay asleep
The Swans would find a different Lake
The Nutcracker would itself crack
The Cathedral would stay sunk
The Girl would do something about her flaxen hair
The Valkyries would ride off into the sunset
La Mer would dry up
Schubert would stop composing Impromptu piano pieces

[gradus]

Pachelbel's canon - except for the version by Musica Antique Koln. Thanks MickyD, you're quite right.

[Nick Armstrong]

So basically....

Brilliant, Suffolkc.!

Agree with most - and having Hoe'd-up, may I add that they should Buckaroo off on holiday somewhere else. One-way ticket, preferably.

[Suffolkcoastal]

Thanks Cali

There were eight more I meant to add

I wish someone would chase Michael Nyman, his shepherd and his sheep over the cliff face
Global warming would cause The Four Seasons to evaporate
The Barber would leave Seville
Someone would cover up the Bare Mountain for a while
A dam was built across the Vltava
Thais would find somewhere else to meditate
Get the Roman's Carnival season cancelled for a while
R3 buy a decent telescope and locate some new Planets

[MickyD]

Pachelbel's canon - except for the version by Musica Antique Koln. Thanks MickyD, you're quite right.

[Richard Barrett]

I think what's being talked about here is people being annoyed with the unimaginative overprogramming of this or that work, rather than being annoyed with the music itself. I find Helmut Lachenmann's Salut für Caudwell highly annoying in various ways I could bore everyone by enumerating, but I don't have to hear it very often. But maybe it's a good idea to counter the unimaginative overprogramming with more imaginative listening. "Ride of the Valkyries", to give a random example, is a miracle of orchestral texture and harmony, Pachelbel's Canon (played by anyone) a unique fusion of simplicity and sophistication... and so on.

The Lark Ascending is a different matter of course.

[ahinton]

Thanks Cali

There were eight more I meant to add

I wish someone would chase Michael Nyman, his shepherd and his sheep over the cliff face
Global warming would cause The Four Seasons to evaporate
The Barber would leave Seville
Someone would cover up the Bare Mountain for a while
A dam was built across the Vltava
Thais would find somewhere else to meditate
Get the Roman's Carnival season cancelled for a while
R3 buy a decent telescope and locate some new Planets

Good one(s)! There's plenty more where those came from, I suspect, even if the music itself isn't necessarily annoying.

I wish that someone would persude Ravel to get someone else to wear his Bolero
It would be better if the Sleeping Beauty never awoke
If the mad woman has to sing on the seashore, it would be better on the fabled and far distant Desert Island
The Nose could usefully be blown
If the Book has Seven Seals, it could easily be left unopened
A certain Russian composer could have left his souvenirs in Florence
A southern French mountain song could have been left alone instead of having a symphony made out of it
What use are Les Djinns sans les Toniques?

...and so on and so off...

[kernelbogey]

Of course it is not the music that is 'annoying' - but we who are (or are not) annoyed.

[ahinton]

The Lark Ascending is a different matter of course.

Well, if you find it annoying in the original version, you could always seek out the chamber version by David Matthews...

Agreed about the Wagner, notwithstanding its popularity as a standalone item.

I'm sure, though, that some of us here would be genuinely interested to find out what it is that annoys you about the Lachenmann if you can be bothered...

[Serial_Apologist]

We could have a Rhapsody in a different colour to Blue

I always love that encounter with Gershwin described by John Ireland:

"I met Gershwin many years ago on one of his visits to this country. Almost as soon as we met he said 'I hear you've written a rrrhapsody. How many performances does it get a year?' 'Two or three', I replied. 'I wrote a rrrhapsody that gets about ten performances a day!'".

For all its Radio 3 repeats, I don't think even the BBC has beaten that one!

[ahinton]

I always love that encounter with Gershwin described by John Ireland:

"I met Gershwin many years ago on one of his visits to this country. Almost as soon as we met he said 'I hear you've written a rrrhapsody. How many performances does it get a year?' 'Two or three', I replied. 'I wrote a rrrhapsody that gets about ten performances a day!'".

For all its Radio 3 repeats, I don't think even the BBC has beaten that one!

Perhaps David Matthews was hoping for a more Gershwinian than Irelandish outcome of the cello concerto that he entitled Concerto in azzuro; doesn't seem to have worked yet, though...