Music for Mourning

[Richard Tarleton]

No matter - funerals, etc., are for the living, and it won't matter to me

Indeed Pabs. And I'm only too aware of differing cultural traditions around funerals, having lived in N Ireland for many years and attended funerals of all denominations. Here, we live near a church and regular funeral venue. I must be one of the few male members of the population round here not to own a black suit, white shirt and black tie kept solely for funerals. I've attended a good few, and it's got to the point where I'd go to almost any lengths not to have to sing "How Great Thou Art" again

[Conchis]

What do people think of pop music in funeral services?

I don't like it, I have to say. Just feels wrong, but that may be an 'age' thing.

That said, I was once talking to someone who agreed with me that pop music at funerals was wrong. 'At mine', he said, 'I'm going to have Maria Callas singing Vissi D'Arte'.

I had a hard time explaining to him that Puccini is pop music.

[kernelbogey]

Several of the 'top ten most requested' funeral music - possibly not the same as top ten played - have been mentioned above, including the Bocelli/Brightman.... I can reveal, Clogg-Popp Pickers, that the Number One choice was... [opens envelope slowly] Ol' Blue Eyes himself - I Did It My Way. (One can imagine former colleagues muttering through sideways gangster mouth 'Didn't he just!')

I agree with Pabs and others that the music, if there is to be any, should be the choice of family et al who are acctually there as opposed to, er, the deceased who will not be listening (probably). A colleague (from another country) found when he came to deal with his father's funeral that he had already done everything, made all decisions, down to writing his death notice for the newspaper (as common in that culture): my friend was furious at having nothing left to do....

[Stanfordian]

My dear wife (like most Filipinas) is a Catholic, and won't hear of my wish - that my body go to be dissected by medical students. No matter - funerals, etc., are for the living, and it won't matter to me - but it will to her, and should be as she desires.

And maybe one of my friends will have a drink and listen to one of my favourites, and have pleasant memories...

It has to be 'The Banks of Green Willow' for you Pabs!

[Serial_Apologist]

It has to be 'The Banks of Green Willow' for you Pabs!

[Conchis]

Several of the 'top ten most requested' funeral music - possibly not the same as top ten played - have been mentioned above, including the Bocelli/Brightman.... I can reveal, Clogg-Popp Pickers, that the Number One choice was... [opens envelope slowly] Ol' Blue Eyes himself - I Did It My Way. (One can imagine former colleagues muttering through sideways gangster mouth 'Didn't he just!')

I agree with Pabs and others that the music, if there is to be any, should be the choice of family et al who are acctually there as opposed to, er, the deceased who will not be listening (probably). A colleague (from another country) found when he came to deal with his father's funeral that he had already done everything, made all decisions, down to writing his death notice for the newspaper (as common in that culture): my friend was furious at having nothing left to do....

I reckon the deceased should also write their own eulogy, if they are capable of doing so.

Time and again, I've listen to someone read something that bears no relation whatsoever to the person I knew.

[Serial_Apologist]

I reckon the deceased should also write their own eulogy, if they are capable of doing so.

Time and again, I've listen to someone read something that bears no relation whatsoever to the person I knew.

Admittedly there is something of a problem in choosing music that would have accorded with the deceased's tastes; but surely those tastes must have something in common with the personality of the person being commemorated? "A lovely man, much missed; it's just a shame he loved Shirley Bassey's singing so much". I myself had enormous difficulties in selecting any hymns which I thought suitable for my father's funeral, and in the end just went along with the presiding clergyman's standard suggestions.

[Conchis]

If I was in charge of a service and someone stipulated that My Way should be played, I would not allow it - unless it was this version:

https://youtu.be/rDyb_alTkMQ

[Serial_Apologist]

If I was in charge of a service and someone stipulated that My Way should be played, I would not allow it - unless it was this version:

https://youtu.be/rDyb_alTkMQ

I was thinking of gentler, but still ironic Stan Tacey Quartet version with Bobby Wellins, which I'll desist from linking.

[kernelbogey]

The last funeral I attended, for my neighbour Bruce, younger than me, just newly retired, who had died of cancer, concluded with Fleetwood Mac: Don't Stop Thinking About Tomorrow.

Made me think, on the way home...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L2DVW_mdMXk