Where is everyone?

[Jonathan]

I don't even bother mentioning musical things at work, there's no point. A very old friend of mine was off to a concert once and said to me "you wouldn't have heard of him, he's still alive".

I also second the comments here about this being a friendly forum!

[Don Petter]

And some seem to know all about how they pitch their wares!

Are they the under-the-counter-tenors?

[Serial_Apologist]

Are they the under-the-counter-tenors?

No: problems in the bagging area, I believe.

[Petrushka]

I've just come to this messageboard again to read only and have seen this thread. I'm at the end of messageboarding experience, having grown bored with it, but I might add some comments as to why the board may have gone quiet. Firstly, there is only so much one can say about the same piece of music, concert, film etc. When one is repeating oneself, which I've done elsewhere, you know it's a sign to stop (and that's what I've decided to do). Secondly, group-think is a feature of many messageboards and dissenters have a very hard time trying to avoid abuse. That's what I found here; a certain tone in comments which had me rolling my eyes and wanting to find the exit. Too many people use the anonymity of the net to abuse others and force their own opinions onto them. I name nobody because this problem is endemic on the internet, not just R3 Forum. I contributed to an American messageboard for 2 years and was driven away by a misanthropic individual who had 'runs on the board' but a huge chip on his shoulder (surely an uncomfortable position for anybody!) and his behaviour continued to be tolerated because "he's been around so long". He was a rage-fuelled and hateful individual who felt better about himself when he was able to put somebody (me and others) down. Zzzzzzz.

Lastly, lots of people hang around messageboards because they have WAY too much time on their hands and/or many don't connect very well with people face to face. You see these people logged in CONSTANTLY, often having little to really say. As I wouldn't want to speak with this kind of person face to face I show no interest in them on the internet because they are seeking attention and affirmation. One such person hounded me from board to board and there was no limit to the amount of embarrassment/humiliation this person attracted. Yo. That's so yesterday. This leads me to my final point; partisan moderation drives good people from messageboards. Contributors need to be accountable for their behaviour and moderation needs to be consistent, fair and non-biased. Too many moderators are part of 'the club' and this is a major deterrent for people like myself. I'm just over it.

That's just my 5 cents worth and you can do with it what you will. With best wishes, Krystal.

Some interesting points here but some dangerous assumptions made about those who populate the Forum as if you can fit people into neat little boxes. This is the only Forum to which I contribute and there's nothing wrong with my social skills. I have a fairly demanding job, talk to a lot of people face to face and enjoy the company of friends and don't think of myself as at all misanthropic

The major problem I've always had, and which others have mentioned, is that none of my friends or family, bless them all, have much, if any, interest in classical music and the great glory of this Forum, perhaps its greatest, is that I can discuss my interest with like-minded individuals some of whom have become 'on-line friends' in the process.

Long may it continue!

[jayne lee wilson]

Like HS and rfg, I've nursed someone close through terminal illness; now my beloved mother is 92, weakening, and maybe won't get any stronger; I owe her so much... I've experienced life-threatening illness myself, and the damage is only partially restored.....
I know what depression really means.

Circumstances like these can isolate you; you seek a means of - sharing, communication, human contact, coming here to share a great, passionate, love of music, of its life-enhancing, deeply healing properties. THIS - this - is why some of us go into such detail about which Birtwistle we like, and why. Or which films moved us to tears and more. It matters, as deeply as anything can matter. Art makes us human and we want to share how, and why.

Kea, I'm sorry if you feel friendless and isolated. I won't, I'm quite sure, be the only person here who can identify with that (in ways which might surprise you in your pain; everybody's pain is different, surprising - and important).

Look at the last day or two... Football, Robin Williams, Lauren Bacall, Sibelius, Birtwistle, me or SC going on about our encounters with the rare and the little known, feeling a little put out sometimes at the lack of a response to our too-lengthy efforts... and learning to smile at that. At ourselves. Going back to that precious one-to-one with the music itself.

Attention seeking, affirmation? It happens every minute of the day, in every street, every house... "it's not your fault"...
It's Life... no-one gets cured of Life...

What matters is - going on. "Fail again, fail better". This forum can - bore, frustrate, infuriate, affirm, shout in triumph, weep for joy and for sorrow... but if it says nothing else, it says: Art matters. The Individual Human Being matters.

[Dave2002]

Thank you my deepest Sympathy, HS

Seconded. My best wishes to you both, and also to Jayne and anyone else here who is living through difficult times.

[salymap]

Seconded. My best wishes to you both, and also to Jayne and anyone else here who is living through difficult times.

I send best wishes to all going through difficult times, as I am after several falls, spells in hospital.etc.

I am now deaf, unable to hear any music and, at mid 80s unable to see much, although new spex are on order.

These andthe old boards have meant alot to me for over 7 years- a link with old friends.

Good luck to Jayne and HS specially - I just have my own severe back pain etc to worry me, parents etc lng gone.

Bestio

[Flosshilde]

Bestio

So good to see you back, Saly - bestio to you too

[Dave2002]

These andthe old boards have meant alot to me for over 7 years- a link with old friends.

Bestio

Glad to see you back, and very glad that you have pulled through the winter and spring. I hope you'll continue to get some pleasure from reading the ramblings of those who come here, and also are able to continue to contribute yourself.

Bestio to you too.

[BBMmk2]

In some ways I think Kea has some good points, although, imo, I think it can amount to be quite dangerous to 'box' people in. With me, my day to day work is not so time consuming especially in the holiday time. I think also that this messageboard, site ,as RFG, has said is one3 of the most civilized ones I have ben on and does have quite a lot of interesting threads and posts. Long may it continue.

[Flay]

What matters is - going on. "Fail again, fail better". This forum can - bore, frustrate, infuriate, affirm, shout in triumph, weep for joy and for sorrow... but if it says nothing else, it says: Art matters. The Individual Human Being matters.

This forum is brilliant: informative, friendly, polite, articulate. Together with the previous Radio 3 forums it helped me get back to classical music, broadening interests and general knowledge, and even changed some of my opinions.

I am sorry to hear about the distresses suffered by Richard, HS, Jayne and others. I have been side-tracked recently due to the illness and recent death of my mother-in-law. I the past I used to joke that having the in-laws living 350 miles away was the ideal situation for any bloke. However it has been far from this in the reality of recent circumstances.

So good to see you back, Saly - bestio to you too

Indeed, this is excellent news, saly!

[antongould]

This forum is brilliant: informative, friendly, polite, articulate. Together with the previous Radio 3 forums it helped me get back to classical music, broadening interests and general knowledge, and even changed some of my opinions.

I am sorry to hear about the distresses suffered by Richard, HS, Jayne and others. I have been side-tracked recently due to the illness and recent death of my mother-in-law. I the past I used to joke that having the in-laws living 350 miles away was the ideal situation for any bloke. However it has been far from this in the reality of recent circumstances.



Indeed, this is excellent news, saly!

Well said Flay in the immortal words of Chapman and Knight it's Simply the Best....

[PJPJ]

I send best wishes to all going through difficult times, as I am after several falls, spells in hospital.etc.

I am now deaf, unable to hear any music and, at mid 80s unable to see much, although new spex are on order.

These andthe old boards have meant alot to me for over 7 years- a link with old friends.

Good luck to Jayne and HS specially - I just have my own severe back pain etc to worry me, parents etc lng gone.

Bestio

Oh, dear Salymap, I am sorry to learn of your news, but it is indeed good to see you back posting here.

All good wishes

[Flay]

This forum is brilliant: informative, friendly, polite, articulate.

Oh and I should add it can be hilarious. I have had (far too many) hours of fun especially on the (hopefully) temporarily suspended AA thread, and creating one or two spoof postings (and Groan's Dictionary ).

[french frank]

Yes, good to see saly posting again - albeit with all the problems that have to be battled with.

Every forum has its own character (and characters). There are plenty of tough, opinionated people but as long as they have something interesting to say this is a place to learn. I don't know a lot about music but I DO buy new CDs based on what I read here, whereas in the past I learned from Radio 3 and bought things I heard there. The difference between someone here who I feel I know enthusing about a CD is encouraging. Hearing that thousands (hundreds?) of people have bought one so that it's reached the Specialist Classical Chart has no effect on me at all.