Rude conductors

[Sir Velo]

Didn't Reiner also have a similar reputation? - and Boult, despite his benign appearance?

A lot of fuss is made about the recording of Boult's rehearsal of the choir for The Pilgrim's Progress which is on as an "extra" on the EMI CD release. However, to my mind, it all sounds like fairly genial banter on Sir Adrian's part, as he tries to coax his mainly amateur choir, punctuated with a few exasperated cries of despair; "Choir, you all sound like a bunch of washerwomen!".

[Flosshilde]

several conductors gathered together.

So what is a gathering of conductors called?

[amateur51]

So what is a gathering of conductors called?

Downbeat?

[Madame Suggia]

My mobile telephone rang during a concert,

You should have seen the rude look the conductor gave me.

[Pulcinella]

The bad conductor joke is #6 in the Current (sic) favourite jokes thread on Platform 3!

[mercia]

So what is a gathering of conductors called?

a baton round ?

[Ariosto]

Didn't Reiner also have a similar reputation? - and Boult, despite his benign appearance?

Boult was wonderful because he had a great sense of humour and was always very nice, unless you lit up a fag during the reheasal.

[MrGongGong]

A bull and an orchestra ?

[Petrushka]

I remember Rodney Friend, leader of the LPO, saying in a TV interview that Boult looked quite calm from the back as the audience saw him but from the front he was foaming at the mouth. Again I can't recall the exact words but the sense is clear.

[verismissimo]

Toscanini was rehearsing his NBC Orchestra in New York. True to his reputation, he harangued various members of the orchestra about the inadequacy of their playing.

Eventually the tuba player could stand it no longer. Up and out.

At the door he turned and shouted: “Nerts.”

“It’s too late to apologise now,” shot back Toscanini.

[Hornspieler]

When we played for the Bolshoi Ballet at Covent Garden, far too little rehearsal time was
allocated for the numerous works that were to be performed; in spite of the fact that we had a
four hour rehearsal every morning and ended up having earned thirty seven hours of
overtime in a fortnight. The language barrier did not help and some of the early
performances had their dodgy moments. On the first night that we played the full version of
Swan Lake, the conductor (Algar Zuriaitis) sent for the Leader and all the Principals;
in the interval between the second and third acts.
A young violinist from the back desks, who had learnt to speak Russian in the Royal Navy,
was sent with us to act as interpreter. Mostly, it was to comment on points of interpretation and style.

Then he addressed himself to the Leader:

There followed a stream of vituperation that must have lasted all of four minutes. He
turned to the young fiddler. “Translate!”

The young man, who had only been in the orchestra for a matter of weeks and was still on
trial, was placed in an impossible situation. He hesitated for a few moments and then said
“... er ... well, he says you're not quite giving him what he wants.”

Later, a group of us sought out the youngster and asked exactly what had been said. (The
Leader of the orchestra at that time had a circle of friends which was insufficient to make a
complete circle.)

“Well,” he grinned. “He didn't actually mention the Siberian salt mines ...”

HS

[Don Petter]

So what is a gathering of conductors called?

A cabal?

[ahinton]

So what is a gathering of conductors called?

An arm-y?

[Ariosto]

A catastrophe?

[Nick Armstrong]

This sounds like a variation on the conductor who is sentenced to the electric chair for murdering his concertmaster. The conductor is strapped in, asked if he has any last words and then the current is turned on. 10,000 volts are sent through his body. Nothing happens. The conductor smiles. 25,000 volts are then sent pulsating into the chair. Still no adverse effect. Finally, the voltage is increased to the maximum. 100,000 volts of electricity are sent through the equipment. Lights explode, doors fly open and howls are heard throughout the prison. The conductor simply smiles again.

The head electrician is sent for. "The equipment is fine but this man is obviously a non-conductor".

May I suggest an alternative?