An over-confident couple in their early thirties with a child on the way have £450,000 to spend on a house. Each is, quote, a boarding school teacher. How did they get that sort of money? The programme doesn't say but all programmes of this kind mainly feature unfathomable people. Those who don't show in their character huge amounts of ability or nous.
As one sits there asking all the hows and whys - it's a mysterwee as Toyah might once have said - it is easy to forget that none of them is exactly typical. Beyond the renters and the genuinely homeless, the huge number of people in static caravans is now one of this country's biggest unseens and the same is true of those who are in granny flats or, in the case of young people, have mortgages for tiny studio apartments. In fact, there are many things that we are never told as others are being advised how to pursue the house buying dream.
Neighbours, for example, are hardly ever mentioned. It is as if none of them could ever be a problem. In the real world, one third are good, one third are indifferent and one third are hell on earth. While almost everyone seems to want more space - and is there anything more irritating than those who can afford big areas complaining that those areas are not quite big enough? - no one mentions the pain in the neck that is regular maintenance, something that is so much worse in a bigger house. On occasions, there are ex-council properties, obvious from the design and historically those did tend to be larger, but apparently it is politically incorrect or inconvenient to mention that they were ever council properties. Why?
As for local facilities, schools are often mentioned but never the adequacy of hospitals and other medical services. This is a television world in which people rarely get ill and there is no such thing as a postcode lottery on health provision. When it comes to the wonderful views beyond the properties, there is never any discussion in these programmes about whether any adjoining fields are likely to be developed for housing, turned into a waste dump or, even worse, fracked. Over a long period of time, I have worked this one out. The only comparatively safe view is one on a historical castle which is unlikely to be moved or on the rare stretches of sea which will never be windmilled or pipelined. No. Far more important, it seems, is whether there is a "breakfast island" in the kitchen or a lovely Victorian fireplace. The latter never looks beautiful to me but rather an eyesore. It triggers thoughts in me of Dickens.
As one sits there asking all the hows and whys - it's a mysterwee as Toyah might once have said - it is easy to forget that none of them is exactly typical. Beyond the renters and the genuinely homeless, the huge number of people in static caravans is now one of this country's biggest unseens and the same is true of those who are in granny flats or, in the case of young people, have mortgages for tiny studio apartments. In fact, there are many things that we are never told as others are being advised how to pursue the house buying dream.
Neighbours, for example, are hardly ever mentioned. It is as if none of them could ever be a problem. In the real world, one third are good, one third are indifferent and one third are hell on earth. While almost everyone seems to want more space - and is there anything more irritating than those who can afford big areas complaining that those areas are not quite big enough? - no one mentions the pain in the neck that is regular maintenance, something that is so much worse in a bigger house. On occasions, there are ex-council properties, obvious from the design and historically those did tend to be larger, but apparently it is politically incorrect or inconvenient to mention that they were ever council properties. Why?
As for local facilities, schools are often mentioned but never the adequacy of hospitals and other medical services. This is a television world in which people rarely get ill and there is no such thing as a postcode lottery on health provision. When it comes to the wonderful views beyond the properties, there is never any discussion in these programmes about whether any adjoining fields are likely to be developed for housing, turned into a waste dump or, even worse, fracked. Over a long period of time, I have worked this one out. The only comparatively safe view is one on a historical castle which is unlikely to be moved or on the rare stretches of sea which will never be windmilled or pipelined. No. Far more important, it seems, is whether there is a "breakfast island" in the kitchen or a lovely Victorian fireplace. The latter never looks beautiful to me but rather an eyesore. It triggers thoughts in me of Dickens.
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